Husbands on TV

By michelle o. on 10/19/08 7:20am
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Sunday, October 19
9:45am

Dear Diary

Sigh… Another Saturday night passed without a date. Isn’t quite as big of a deal now that I’m married, but it’s high time Barack took me out. And not just for some campaign-publicity stunt. Decided to watch appearances of Biden and McCain on Jay Leno and David Letterman.

Well, I guess Biden did ok on Leno. He made such a big deal about how Joe the Plumber and Joe Six-Pack were taking up too much media attention, and that he wanted more. Well, look. At least he’s on Jay Leno! I certainly haven’t had the chance to go on Jay Leno. And in my opinion, Joe’s gotten a lot more media attention than I have, so why is he complaining? Honestly.

But the way that McCain talked about how “proud” he was of Sarah Palin… Well, I just thought that was insulting for any woman! She’s going out and doing her job, and McCain has to talk about how proud he is, as if she couldn’t do it otherwise?

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Wives in Print

By michelle o. on 10/18/08 9:11am
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Saturday, October 18
11:30am

Dear Diary,

Quite interesting to read about Cindy McCain in the New York Times. At first didn’t think much of this rich woman, who stole John away from his first wife who’d waited on him while he was a POW. But now that the womanizer has taken up with another woman, I just feel sorry for her. Who can blame her for wanting to stay on the beach in a high-rise condo. I certainly wouldn’t want to be stuck on an Arizona ranch in the middle of nowhere. But, since McCain isn’t a “beach person,” he won’t even live in the same state with her.

Nevertheless, to compare herself to Diana, Princess of Wales, is laughable.

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Barack's Faults

By michelle o. on 10/16/08 3:25pm
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Thursday, October 16
5:15pm

Dear Diary,

After much decision, have completed the list of Barack’s faults. After all, he did say in the second debate that I had a list of his faults. And Jon Stewart asked for it later. Was able to overcome fact that I didn’t have list yet with simple comedy. But I’m now realizing how useful this list could be. because I’m working on being a supportive wife and hopefully First Lady, I have shortened the list from ten faults to five.

So here is the Top Five List of Barack’s faults:

1. Barack uses the words “hope” and “change” too much in his campaign. It’s called a thesaurus. Use it. Still, they’re less annoying than maverick.
2. Barack can be too nice. Honestly, he couldn’t say one mean thing about Palin during the 3rd debate? Even her supporters can come up with something.
3. Barack has yet to bring up how I would make a better Vice-President than Sarah Palin.
4.

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Post-debate Perspective

By michelle o. on 10/15/08 3:31pm
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Wednesday, October 15
11:58pm

Dear Diary,

Just arrived home from debate, and I have very mixed feelings. First of all, who does John McCain think he is?! He didn’t remember my name??? I am Michelle Obama! And don’t you forget it, John. Furthermore, how dare he put the health of a woman in air quotes?! Lord knows he would never mock a man’s health. That probably cost him a large number of votes from women, unless they are pro-life. Never did understand women who’d allow the government to control pregnant women… Am hoping that others picked up on these insults and will vote accordingly.

Also, shocking when McCain talked about Sarah Palin’s autistic child. Either he doesn’t care to know enough about the kids of his running mate (which speaks to his vetting process), or he doesn’t have a clue about the difference between autism and down syndrome! Or perhaps this is confirmation that the senility is really setting in.

Regardless, my husband had a great debate.

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Pre-debate Ponderings

By michelle o. on 10/14/08 3:41pm
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Tuesday, October 14th
9:45am

Dear Diary,

Was recently sent picture of self with “World’s Biggest Obama Fan.” Wow, I guess so. I, of course, looked short standing next to him. Still, will not allow this to change image of self as a tall woman. After all, tall people are correlated with leadership…

Looking forward to debate tomorrow. Barack does look handsome, and in the last debate, he appeared particularly composed. Of course, that was probably just because McCain was pacing up and down the stage. Obviously nervous. Still bizarre that he can’t muster the common decency to look at my husband is unnerving.

Have plans to sit with Republican Senator Hagel’s wife, an Obama supporter. Yet another Republican that has switched over! Yay!

Must get lots of beauty sleep for tomorrow.

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Obamas on Top

By michelle o. on 10/13/08 9:15am
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Monday, October 13th
8:02pm

Dear Diary,

I am outraged! The nerve of McCain’s advisors to think that they could go after someone like me. This swift-boating is getting ridiculous. Do they really think that attacking me is going to get him elected?! If anyone should be attacked, it’s Cindy McCain! SHE’S the one who’s addicted to pain killers, and she stole them from her own nonprofit organization! Who is more fit to be the First Lady? And don’t get me started on Sarah Palin. That woman is a walking disaster. So for them to attack me for working at the same law-firm as Ayres wife?! They will stop at nothing. Thank god the media loves me.

Just saw clips of myself at rallies in Minnesota. Damn, I am good. There’s a chance we can win this state, and I am doing everything I can do to get it. Not just to get Barack elected. I don’t want that Cindy in the White House.

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Cover-ups Galore

By michelle o. on 10/12/08 1:47pm
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Sunday, October 12
10:13am

Dear Diary,

Well, the election is 23 days away, which means that we’re entering the home stretch. Good thing, too. I can tell Sasha and Malia are tired of life on the campaign trail, and just want our family life to get back to normal. Though it will be interesting to see how normal family life can be in the White House…

Went to the gym yesterday. Grabbed a magazine with some gossip about Palin advertised on the cover. Looked interesting and probably all true, so obviously I wanted to read it. But somebody had ripped out all the pages with her in it! Couldn’t believe it! And was seriously disappointed, since I was looking forward to some satisfyingly scandalous stories. And who rips out pages of a magazine?! That’s desperation right there. Can’t stand to read the truth. Resorting to last ditch attempts to shield this information from the public. But it’s getting out anyway.

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Racism Revealed

By michelle o. on 10/11/08 3:34am
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Saturday, October 11
12:05am

Dear Diary,

Whew, what a week! After the debate, the Daily Show, and going on Larry King Live, I’m looking forward to finally settling in my role as First Lady. Discussed Barack’s campaign with Larry King, and rocked it. Pity I can’t run for President right now... Of course Larry brought up John’s “That one” comment. Hard to pretend I wasn’t insulted by that comment, not to mention John’s tone during the whole debate. Still, must not play race card unless absolutely necessary. Seems like Barack has this election in the bag, so we agreed it’s best to stay positive. Still…

Very creepy to hear about McCain and Palin’s rallies. To think that they would condone comments like “Kill him,” while referring to Barack. I had hoped our country has come farther than this. Would use the race card, but since enough people in our country are also disturbed, we can let them to the talking.

Malia asked me the other day when I was going to be president.

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Path to the Presidency

By michelle o. on 10/9/08 2:32pm
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Friday, October 10th
12:30am

Dear Diary,

Have decided to start own diary after hearing about Barack’s. Heard his is guarded by a password, but that’s nothing that a Harvard grad can’t figure out. Surely, some combination of “hope” and “change” can unlock its secrets. Plus, I deserve a bit of privacy after being vetted more closely than Sarah Palin.

To begin…Woken up by Malia crying because everyone knows names of Sarah's children, but no one knows about her and Sasha. Explained it was because of tender age, but was countered with argument that Bristol isn't much older. Had no response, so am thinking of ways to get media attention for children without resorting to teen pregnancy or alcoholism. If only were old enough for drug addiction as have heard is effective way of getting attention. Perhaps fashion line instead? Will run idea by David.

Watched the clip of myself on The Daily Show last night. Surprised to find Jon Stewart so short.

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