October 2008

  • Michelle Obama, First Lady

    By michelle o. on 10/30/08 6:42am
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    Thursday, October 30
    5:15pm

    Dear Diary,

    Have begun considering my post-election plans, given the fact I’m a shoe-in as First Lady. I do like the way that sounds: Michelle Obama, First Lady. That would look great on business cards. I’ll have to look into that. But I can’t just be a Laura Bush of First Ladies. I will be seen as an icon, like Eleanor Roosevelt and Jackie Kennedy. My hope is to achieve the same status as they did in their fields: political activism, fashion, and entertainment. I’ve decided to devise a list of ways to gain more publicity and status.

    Michelle Obama’s Top-Five Strategies for a Successful Term as First Lady

    1. More classy outfits. My J. Crew outfit has already garnered much publicity and comparisons to Jackie Kennedy. I can’t get enough of the media spotlight, as long as it’s positive. No more of these fabricated snack-expenditure stories.
    2. Influential social programs.

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  • Election Countdown

    By michelle o. on 10/28/08 3:13pm
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    Tuesday, October 28
    5:25pm

    Dear Diary,

    Can hardly believe that the election is one week away. After all this campaigning, I’m beginning to feel like there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. I really do believe that Barack could win this election, as long as there isn’t some plot to steal the election. Have to admit, I have been concerned about this “Perfect Match” business. After all, it has already disenfranchised so many voters in significant swing states like Florida! And then there are all those voters who were purged from the Colorado voting records by Secretary of State, Mike Coffman. Sure hope they win that lawsuit.

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  • Campaign Expenditures

    By michelle o. on 10/23/08 1:10pm
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    Thursday, October 23
    11:05pm

    Dear Diary,

    I had to deal with all those right-wing bloggers claiming that I’d enjoyed a $447.39 snack consisting of caviar, sparkling wine, lobsters, and other gourmet food. And yet, the most ridiculous part of the whole story is that I wasn’t even staying at that hotel! How desperate do these bloggers have to be? And yet, there’s hardly a peep about the fact that the McCain campaign has spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on Sarah Palin’s image! $4,000 haircuts and new outfits for $150,000?! It’s amazing that someone doesn’t bring this to the national media’s attention. After all, John Edwards had a $400 haircut, which now pales in comparison to Palin’s new do. And, the people who donated that money should know where it’s going. Really telling how the McCain campaign is willing to fork out this much money for beauty. Shows the world where they see her value.

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  • Racism Rekindled

    By michelle o. on 10/20/08 4:07pm
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    Monday, October 20
    10:08pm

    Dear Diary,

    Well, Barack’s going to Hawaii. I’m not going with him, so as to stay in the states and possibly take over some of the campaigning. May join him, if things go from bad to worse though. Sasha and Malia are scared, having a hard time imagining life without their Great-Grandma. I think Barack is feeling the same way. So hard to have to deal with this in the middle of the campaign. But perhaps it will bring us closer to the American people. Not to sound insensitive, but to reiterate that we experience the same issues they do.

    Can’t say I’m surprised that Colin Powell is supporting Barack. He’s a sensible man. Understands good politics. And probably is trying to restore his image. But it’s pretty low campaign advisors, Rush Limbaugh, and others to assume that Powell is doing this for race-related reasons. If that were the case, he would have declared his support for Barack LONG ago. Powell’s basis is for four main reasons:

    1.

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  • Husbands on TV

    By michelle o. on 10/19/08 7:20am
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    Sunday, October 19
    9:45am

    Dear Diary

    Sigh… Another Saturday night passed without a date. Isn’t quite as big of a deal now that I’m married, but it’s high time Barack took me out. And not just for some campaign-publicity stunt. Decided to watch appearances of Biden and McCain on Jay Leno and David Letterman.

    Well, I guess Biden did ok on Leno. He made such a big deal about how Joe the Plumber and Joe Six-Pack were taking up too much media attention, and that he wanted more. Well, look. At least he’s on Jay Leno! I certainly haven’t had the chance to go on Jay Leno. And in my opinion, Joe’s gotten a lot more media attention than I have, so why is he complaining? Honestly.

    But the way that McCain talked about how “proud” he was of Sarah Palin… Well, I just thought that was insulting for any woman! She’s going out and doing her job, and McCain has to talk about how proud he is, as if she couldn’t do it otherwise?

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  • Wives in Print

    By michelle o. on 10/18/08 9:11am
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    Saturday, October 18
    11:30am

    Dear Diary,

    Quite interesting to read about Cindy McCain in the New York Times. At first didn’t think much of this rich woman, who stole John away from his first wife who’d waited on him while he was a POW. But now that the womanizer has taken up with another woman, I just feel sorry for her. Who can blame her for wanting to stay on the beach in a high-rise condo. I certainly wouldn’t want to be stuck on an Arizona ranch in the middle of nowhere. But, since McCain isn’t a “beach person,” he won’t even live in the same state with her.

    Nevertheless, to compare herself to Diana, Princess of Wales, is laughable.

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  • Barack's Faults

    By michelle o. on 10/16/08 3:25pm
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    Thursday, October 16
    5:15pm

    Dear Diary,

    After much decision, have completed the list of Barack’s faults. After all, he did say in the second debate that I had a list of his faults. And Jon Stewart asked for it later. Was able to overcome fact that I didn’t have list yet with simple comedy. But I’m now realizing how useful this list could be. because I’m working on being a supportive wife and hopefully First Lady, I have shortened the list from ten faults to five.

    So here is the Top Five List of Barack’s faults:

    1. Barack uses the words “hope” and “change” too much in his campaign. It’s called a thesaurus. Use it. Still, they’re less annoying than maverick.
    2. Barack can be too nice. Honestly, he couldn’t say one mean thing about Palin during the 3rd debate? Even her supporters can come up with something.
    3. Barack has yet to bring up how I would make a better Vice-President than Sarah Palin.
    4.

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  • Post-debate Perspective

    By michelle o. on 10/15/08 3:31pm
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    Wednesday, October 15
    11:58pm

    Dear Diary,

    Just arrived home from debate, and I have very mixed feelings. First of all, who does John McCain think he is?! He didn’t remember my name??? I am Michelle Obama! And don’t you forget it, John. Furthermore, how dare he put the health of a woman in air quotes?! Lord knows he would never mock a man’s health. That probably cost him a large number of votes from women, unless they are pro-life. Never did understand women who’d allow the government to control pregnant women… Am hoping that others picked up on these insults and will vote accordingly.

    Also, shocking when McCain talked about Sarah Palin’s autistic child. Either he doesn’t care to know enough about the kids of his running mate (which speaks to his vetting process), or he doesn’t have a clue about the difference between autism and down syndrome! Or perhaps this is confirmation that the senility is really setting in.

    Regardless, my husband had a great debate.

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  • Pre-debate Ponderings

    By michelle o. on 10/14/08 3:41pm
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    Tuesday, October 14th
    9:45am

    Dear Diary,

    Was recently sent picture of self with “World’s Biggest Obama Fan.” Wow, I guess so. I, of course, looked short standing next to him. Still, will not allow this to change image of self as a tall woman. After all, tall people are correlated with leadership…

    Looking forward to debate tomorrow. Barack does look handsome, and in the last debate, he appeared particularly composed. Of course, that was probably just because McCain was pacing up and down the stage. Obviously nervous. Still bizarre that he can’t muster the common decency to look at my husband is unnerving.

    Have plans to sit with Republican Senator Hagel’s wife, an Obama supporter. Yet another Republican that has switched over! Yay!

    Must get lots of beauty sleep for tomorrow.

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  • Obamas on Top

    By michelle o. on 10/13/08 9:15am
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    Monday, October 13th
    8:02pm

    Dear Diary,

    I am outraged! The nerve of McCain’s advisors to think that they could go after someone like me. This swift-boating is getting ridiculous. Do they really think that attacking me is going to get him elected?! If anyone should be attacked, it’s Cindy McCain! SHE’S the one who’s addicted to pain killers, and she stole them from her own nonprofit organization! Who is more fit to be the First Lady? And don’t get me started on Sarah Palin. That woman is a walking disaster. So for them to attack me for working at the same law-firm as Ayres wife?! They will stop at nothing. Thank god the media loves me.

    Just saw clips of myself at rallies in Minnesota. Damn, I am good. There’s a chance we can win this state, and I am doing everything I can do to get it. Not just to get Barack elected. I don’t want that Cindy in the White House.

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  • Cover-ups Galore

    By michelle o. on 10/12/08 1:47pm
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    Sunday, October 12
    10:13am

    Dear Diary,

    Well, the election is 23 days away, which means that we’re entering the home stretch. Good thing, too. I can tell Sasha and Malia are tired of life on the campaign trail, and just want our family life to get back to normal. Though it will be interesting to see how normal family life can be in the White House…

    Went to the gym yesterday. Grabbed a magazine with some gossip about Palin advertised on the cover. Looked interesting and probably all true, so obviously I wanted to read it. But somebody had ripped out all the pages with her in it! Couldn’t believe it! And was seriously disappointed, since I was looking forward to some satisfyingly scandalous stories. And who rips out pages of a magazine?! That’s desperation right there. Can’t stand to read the truth. Resorting to last ditch attempts to shield this information from the public. But it’s getting out anyway.

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  • Racism Revealed

    By michelle o. on 10/11/08 3:34am
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    Saturday, October 11
    12:05am

    Dear Diary,

    Whew, what a week! After the debate, the Daily Show, and going on Larry King Live, I’m looking forward to finally settling in my role as First Lady. Discussed Barack’s campaign with Larry King, and rocked it. Pity I can’t run for President right now... Of course Larry brought up John’s “That one” comment. Hard to pretend I wasn’t insulted by that comment, not to mention John’s tone during the whole debate. Still, must not play race card unless absolutely necessary. Seems like Barack has this election in the bag, so we agreed it’s best to stay positive. Still…

    Very creepy to hear about McCain and Palin’s rallies. To think that they would condone comments like “Kill him,” while referring to Barack. I had hoped our country has come farther than this. Would use the race card, but since enough people in our country are also disturbed, we can let them to the talking.

    Malia asked me the other day when I was going to be president.

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  • Path to the Presidency

    By michelle o. on 10/9/08 2:32pm
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    Friday, October 10th
    12:30am

    Dear Diary,

    Have decided to start own diary after hearing about Barack’s. Heard his is guarded by a password, but that’s nothing that a Harvard grad can’t figure out. Surely, some combination of “hope” and “change” can unlock its secrets. Plus, I deserve a bit of privacy after being vetted more closely than Sarah Palin.

    To begin…Woken up by Malia crying because everyone knows names of Sarah's children, but no one knows about her and Sasha. Explained it was because of tender age, but was countered with argument that Bristol isn't much older. Had no response, so am thinking of ways to get media attention for children without resorting to teen pregnancy or alcoholism. If only were old enough for drug addiction as have heard is effective way of getting attention. Perhaps fashion line instead? Will run idea by David.

    Watched the clip of myself on The Daily Show last night. Surprised to find Jon Stewart so short.

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