A lot of people seem to harbor nothing other than undying love for the city of Chicago. It might have something to do with the fact that it’s generally – and unfairly - thought of as a cultural oasis in the Midwest. But the city also counts as something of a competitor with New Yawk and Los Angeles for leverage in any number of art practices. And sometimes folks think it’s a good idea to root for the underdog.

That being said, I think the town kinda stinks. You might not believe that statement to be literal, but it is in some cases. On my way to the train everyday, I can always detect at least the faintest hint of piss. Once downtown, pretty much every alley is fragrant in the same way. That only makes the exorbitant rent all the more bothersome. But that’s just my personal feelings on a city with and extraordinarily deep history in terms of politics, art and probably anything else people now deem somewhat important.

The problem is that the amenities of modern life that we’ve all grown accustomed to don’t really work in this bloody town. Yeah, it’s nothing new to gripe about poor customer service from whatever huge company you deal with, but I’ve had nothing other than troubles with National City Bank, Verizon Wireless and finally AT&T.

The bank, which I selected based solely on its proximity to my home has been bought out by PNC since my having moved to Chicago. That in and of itself might account for some of the problems that I’ve encountered, but it really can’t make them go away. After opening the account, my funds were immediately frozen due to a check that was deposited as payment for some utility bill I payed. There was no moving the company and I was unable to access my account for the better part of a week and half. That happened twice within one month

Verizon Wireless, the only company I’d ever had cell phone service with, has the spottiest reception in the part of town I live in. At first, everyone figured my auld tyme phone to be the culprit. But it worked in Seattle, Cleveland, the Bay and Atlanta - just not within a square mile of my home. Eventually, Verizon sent technicians to my neighborhood and gave me a call to let me know that where I lived didn’t have a good signal. Thanks.

Finally, over the last two months, my internet connection has been finicky at best. Two different technicians have been dispatched to my home, fixed something and told me various reasons as to why my DSL connection wasn’t working. It crapped out again this week (finals week) with someone finally deciding my modem was the culprit. The proverbial ‘They’ wanted me to buy another after already having forced me into buying one when I started service. I convinced them simply send me a new one, but I get to wait a week while UPS delivers it.

All of these incidents wouldn’t be too bad if they’d been spaced out over a long period of time, but it’s all occurred in just about seven months. And Chicago wonders why it’s relegated to third place in a contest of American cities. I don’t.